Among the many, many problems with the Iowa FAMiLY Leader pledge that Michele Bachmann and Rick Santorum rushed to sign was this line in the preamble.
" Slavery had a disastrous impact on African-American families, yet sadly a child born into slavery in 1860 was more likely to be raised by his mother and father in a two-parent household than was an African-American baby born after the election of the USA's first African-American President."
Ok, what the fuck?
Somebody start playing fucking "Schoolhouse Rock" in the fucking Heartland for fuck's sake before we're all that fucking stupid.
Oh. yeah. In case you missed it: fuck.
With his "major" foreign policy speech in Washington today, Tim Pawlenty established himself as the most neoconservative member of the GOP presidential field, as well as its worst grammarian. Here is the title line of the speech:
"Now is not the time to retreat from freedom’s rise."
That came just two sentences after Pawlenty announced his intention "to speak plainly this morning."
And if they don't, can you even get reruns of Schoolhouse Rock?
"He who warned, uh, the British that they weren't going to be taking away our arms uh by ringing those bells and making sure as he's riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be secure and we were going to be free and we were going to be armed."— Sarah Palin on Paul Revere, June 3, 2011
So the kiddo is really into Transformers right now. This afternoon, Becky pointed out a minivan that had a Decepticon sticker on it.
Seth: Is he a Decepticon?
Mom: Looks like.
Seth: What's his name?
Mom: I'm not sure. I think he's in disguise, waiting to transform.
Seth: What does he do?
Dad: His name is Suburbo. He steals your dreams.
Me: Ok, little buddy. Time for tubby.
Seth: Can I take my clothes off?
Me: That would help, yes.
Seth: Can I take my pants off and dance?
Me (shrugs): Sure. We'll just pretend it's Last Call.
Seth: Daddy, fix my seat. Daddy, can you get my toy? Daddy, buckle my seatbelt...
Paracynic: (muttering) Aye, aye.
Seth: Daddy, you need to say 'Aye, aye, Captain.'
1. There is no such thing as a standard sized medicine cabinet.
2. Stores will try, without any visible flicker of remorse, try to charge you $300.00 for an aluminum box with two shelves and a mirrored door.
3. The guy who invented wallpaper deserved to die a horrible, slow and lingering death. I hope he did.
4. My house was built in 1964. If it is representative of mid 60's American craftsmanship, it's no wonder we lost the Vietnam War.
5. Other than the outlet on the old, crappy, rusty, awful medicine cabinet, there was no outlet at all in the room. The '60's sucked.
6. But they did have the heaviest gauge wire known to man. I could have built a suspension bridge out of that stuff. Which made installing a new outlet loads of fun.
Is it wrong to teach my son the days of the week by playing The Clash's version of Police on My Back?